Even the best conflict engagement professionals can be blindsided by an occasional toxic exchange. Despite how fantastic a day may start, a few harsh words can catch us off-guard, leaving us feeling defensive, angry or belittled. You can keep difficult people from bringing you down with them and poisoning your well. There are surprisingly effective strategies for bouncing back and preventing conflicts from getting the best of you.
I’ll walk you through an example from my own experience.
Jingles may wish us happy holidays, but commercials and social media, by design, influence how we bedeck our homes, spend our money, measure happiness and practice traditions around holidays. It can be overwhelming.
If we succumb to all the pressures buzzing around us, the reality is this: the main focus of the holidays is wiped out by stress, misunderstanding and conflict. Here are a few personal stories as well as tips from my 20+ years as a mediator on how to avoid common pitfalls.
Most of us rely on auto-correction software, but how often do people check messages for conflict-inducing digs? You know what I mean, the ones that hit below the belt. They’re loaded with passive-aggressive undercurrents of sarcasm. They’re discounting, insulting or disrespectful. They blame or deflect responsibility. They triangulate, lack compassion, strike a nerve, etc. Even when the sender denies the intention of harm, knee-jerk messaging, particularly when sent electronically, can escalate quickly into drama and conflict, often with harmful consequences.
